“When I go, I want to go doing what I do best. If I died tomorrow, I couldn’t complain. It’s been good.” – Lemmy Kilmister
This article will force you to think of your life from an angle that you might have been ignoring lately. Even if you think “rock n’ roll” is a marching technique used in the army. Even if you think that “Motörhead” is a type of V8 combustible petrol engine. And even if you think that “Lemmy” is one of Woody Allen’s pet gold fishes. Which I doubt you do.
I write about health and fitness. Mentioning ‘Lemmy’ and ‘health’ in the same sentence sounds as about right as ‘Bieber’ and ‘music’ in the same sentence. It’s the same as scratching your nails on a chalk board. It just doesn’t sound right.
But I also write about life and it’s hard to think of a person who lived more than Lemmy Kilmister. He lived life to the fullest doing the things that he loved. I am not glorifying his lifestyle here, it’s not what I would enjoy doing. Yet it doesn’t mean that we can’t learn from the way that he lived. No matter how removed someone’s life is from yours, you can always learn from each and every person just by studying their attitude towards life.
Australian nurse Bonnie Ware, who cared for the dying for the last twelve weeks of their lives wrote down their most discussed regrets. At the top of the list? “I wish I’d have the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.” That’s deep.
Lemmy didn’t try to fit in or to please anyone. The first Motörhead record sounded the same as the 22nd. He wore what he wanted. He had two massive ugly moles on his cheek, he didn’t care. He lived in a small apartment above he’s favourite bar. No mansions. He was a true essentialist doing what was important for him.
So do the things that you enjoy. Is life where you strive for a six pack, the perfect tan and the perfect body worth it? Are you making a contribution? You train 6 days a week, your eating habits look more like a math class and your social life would make Guantanamo Bay’s isolation section look like a party. If you would die tomorrow, would you be happy how you spent your time? At your funeral are people going to talk how good you looked on the beach every summer?
I enjoy training. Honestly, I occasionally obsess over it. It makes me feel good and keeps me sane. I try to get my vegetables in each day. But there are days that I don’t feel like training. I don’t always eat enough vegetables, protein or drink enough water because of other things in life get in the way. When I don’t I’d like to think that I’ve sacrificed those things for something that was more important at that time. Maybe I had a healthy, balanced meal prepared at work but decided to go out for a lunch with a mate instead. I chose to eat something that wasn’t as top-notch healthy as I would’ve had pre-made. But I chose the company over the meal. Because that’s what I valued more at the time.
I want to be able to have lunch outside without worrying what is the healthiest option to have or worrying whether this is organic or not. Sometimes good enough is good enough. I don’t want to be a calorie counting, food obsessing, health robot.
If you are living your life prioritising your looks over everything else, you are not living your life true to yourself but rather to please and impress other people. You care what others think of you. I don’t care what your argument is. It is invalid. Who cares how organic and nutrient rich your diet is if you never get to break bread with other people. You might live to a hundred but was it all worth it in the end. Don’t just add years to your life. Add quality years doing things that are important.
I am willing to sacrifice some of my body fat and not worry about whether the party I am attending is going to have healthy options or not. If there is six different desserts on offer, you bet I will try them all. If I would die tomorrow I doubt I would regret doing so. I’ve been on the other side doing the opposite and it’s not life.
By doing so I accept the fact that I won’t necessarily have a cover model body. Whatever choices you make, understand the consequences and acknowledge that if you eat out six days a week it will affect your body image goals. There’s nothing wrong or right about it, you just have to be clear. Ask yourself what is the most important thing for you. If you are 40kg overweight and have a high chance of dying of a heart failure before your kid’s tenth birthday you have a choice to make. Which one is it?
I don’t want to be on my death bed wishing I hadn’t worked so hard while missing out on life. This doesn’t mean that I have the urgency to go and down a bucket of ice cream each weekend or get shitfaced each Saturday. I don’t. If there’s a party on and I rather stay at home reading or watching a movie that’s what I will do. Why keep up with the appearances if that’s not what you want to do. I strive that whatever I do each day is something that I want. Not doing it because I have to or because other people expect you to do so or it is the “right” thing to do. No, I do it because that’s important for me.
Does this mean that you have to be selfish and ignore everyone else’s needs in your life? No. If you are in a relationship sometimes you have to make compromises. But even then you do things that you know are important to your partner. Which, if you are with the right person, makes them the important things for you to do. That’s how you keep a healthy and happy relationship. And healthy relationship equals a better life with the person you want to spend your time with. So if you really twist things around, you are actually doing it for yourself as your partner’s happiness increases your happiness.
Well, a lot of talk about dying in this post. It’s a morbid thought but there’s no way around it, we are all going to die. So why not think about it instead of pushing it under the carpet. Death and taxes. That’s where it’s at. Hopefully mine and your time is far far far in the future but I urge you to value your life based on the fact that, eventually, you will die. Whether you want to dedicate your life to health, training, helping other people, family, music, good times or whatever. Do what matters to you the most and what makes you happy.
Lemmy lived for music, he played his last gig few weeks before his death. Once he learned that he was on his way out, he’s words were “I’ve had a good run, fuck it”.
Live your life so that when you reflect back on it you can do so with no regrets. Make it count.
Album I listened to while pulling out All The Aces (get it?):
Motörhead – Bomber
References:
Bonnie Ware, “The Top Five Regrets of The Dying”, The Guardian
Recommended Reading:
Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less by Greg McKeown
If you are interested in a balanced approach to health and fitness that doesn’t suck enter your email address below to receive my 30 page eBook. Needless to say that I think it’s awesome. You’ll also get the latest blog post to your email each Tuesday.
Leave a Reply