Since reading Daring Greatly – How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead by Brene Brown* I’ve started to notice even more how people talk to themselves down over and over again. And since I spend most of my time training clients in a gym, this negative self talk is most often related to one’s body and self-image.
“I am fat/weak/bad/” or insert any other negative adjective. These are some common sentences that I hear every day. It’s what Brown calls shame-talk and something that has a very negative consequences to our self-worth and well-being (more…)
A while back Tony Gentilcore wrote a series of blog posts titled Confessions of an introverted strength coach. I will steal his headline (that he stole from a movie) for this blog post and write my own confessions. This might even become a series.
It seems to surprise people when I explain how I actually eat. You might think that all personal trainers are a calorie counting robots (think R2D2 meets Robocop) who eat to maintain a ten-pack and deep deltoid separation. Not the case. (more…)
There, I just proved a point. The sensationalism in the headline surely caught your attention. Don’t feel too bad, it’s not just you. It’s all of us until we build up our bullshit-radar.
It’s easy to fall into thinking that harder is better when every source of “creditable” fitness information tells you to be a hardcore gym monster and a lean machine. The truth is that no one wants you to think that fat loss and fitness is simple. That would mean that fitness magazines would run out of topics in about a week. The morning shows about health wouldn’t have anything to talk about on a weekly bases. All these different sources want you to believe (they might actually believe it themselves) that they are helping you. When in fact they are doing more damage to your fat loss efforts than you might think. We would be a healthier world without the constant bombardments about latest diet crazes or the secret fat busting workouts. (more…)
Update 5.10.2016: If you’d like to receive a copy of the updated PDF version of this program, subscribe on the top right of this page. Once you’re done just reply to my welcome message and I’ll get the program to you.
Often people don’t get anywhere with their fitness goals due poor (or non-existent) training planning. Or worse, people keep going through cycles of getting injured. Hey, I know how it’s like. I used to be one of those people. (more…)
You’ve set yourself a clear goal to reach your health goal in six months. You’ve know that the biggest road block is your appetite for sweets at work. You’re motivated, committed and maxed out on willpower.
Until the first busy afternoon at work when your stress levels are through the roof. You start fancying a thought of a sweet sweet chocolate goodness. You try not to think of that vending machine loaded with chocolate bars. Or that bowl of chocolates in the break room. But no matter how hard you try the chocolate goodness creeps back in your head until it become impossible to resist. So you give in and make the vending machine sing, but only today. Because tomorrow you’re stronger, more motivated, even more committed and full of willpower.
And then tomorrow afternoon rolls around and you repeat the same cycle. Same thing happens over and over again. Why is that and what to do about it? To find an answer we have to revisit a couple of studies from the past.
The way you approach health and fitness should not be an on/off button but a dial. A dial where you can choose your level of involvement at any given time.
At times you want to crank it up. And other times you have to dial it down to the absolute minimum to hear other things in life clearer. Big project at work? Turn the fitness dial down to get only the basics done. Quiet at work and extra time to rest and recover? Turn the dial up. But for the most part you should keep your dial somewhere in the middle. (more…)
Every now and then I like to take a look back and see how my thoughts have evolved on some topics in the fitness industry. My opinion is that it’s crucial to learn from one’s mistakes to better yourself as a coach and a trainer (or as a person). Looking back now I can say that, yes I was wrong, but at the time I coached my clients as best as I knew. It’s just that opinions change as we grow. And it’s given that in the future I will look back at some of the things I believe in now and realize I’ve changed my mind about them. That’s all good and I am always willing to have my beliefs challenged if it helps me going forward. (more…)
One of the biggest obstacles most people have with training or healthy cooking is time. Or the lack of it. I get it; you feel like there is not enough time in the day to fit everything in.
Yet, I am sure that at times you have been busy and something came up that just had to get done. Maybe you got invited to a party you couldn’t say no to. Or something urgent came up at work that needed attention yesterday. In those situations, somehow magically it seems, the extra time just appears from a thin air.
Few posts ago I mentioned about my 60 day pull up challenge. I started with 10 pull ups on Day One, adding a rep each day and aiming to finish with 70 reps on the last day. It’s a cool little challenge and definitely doable if you have a bit of a base on doing pull ups. I’ve done it in the past and the biggest obstacle always seemed to be to find the extra time to do it all.
And my personal favourite “Sweat is just your fat crying”
So when it’s all cheesy sayings and good intentions, why is it that fitness inspiration aka FITSPO is rubbish and why do I believe it can and probably does cause more harm than good?
A few years ago after eating and drinking my way through the cold UK winters with reckless abandonment, I was messing around on social media when I came across my first FITSPO post. There she was, a wonderfully tanned and oiled woman wearing nothing but a six pack telling me that I too could look that good if only I would remember that “unless you puke, faint or die, keep going”.
I looked at those well-toned arms and shining six pack and I was suddenly transported back to my teens, the days where I represented my country in my sport and back to the days where I too looked fabulous, although not that tall, in an outfit that teeny tiny. The problem with that picture was that while it did inspire me to want to better myself and get back to the way things were, it also sent me quickly down a dangerous path of obsession, frustration and alienation.
In next to no time at all my days became a routine of 5.30am fasted cardio followed by tiny portions of “good foods” during my working day with more cardio after work and a minuscule dinner of more “good foods”. No eating after 6.30pm mind you and DEFINITELY NO CARBS AT NIGHT. Friday night drinks with my mates became a huge stress in my week. If my fiancé suggested pizza for dinner I’d practically combust with pent up worry.
So, was it all worth it? Did I get my six pack back? Nope. But I got slimmer right? A little bit yes. Was I happier? Nope. Was I healthier? Definitely not! The truth is that while fitness seems to be the in thing these days, what’s also tagging along for the ride is our obsession with perfection. Social media and in particular FITSPO is the fuel feeding those perfectionist flames. These perfectly styled photographs and catchy sayings aren’t telling us the full story.
They’re not telling us about the sheer amount of sacrifice (I’m talking socially as well everything else) it took to achieve such results, they’re not telling us about the other 9 months of the year when the model doesn’t look like that, they’re not telling us that the before and after photos were taken on the same day, just with better lighting and a better fitting outfit and they’re certainly not telling us about the fantastic effort of the guy playing around with photoshop to get such a great shot.
Our fitness inspiration should come from things that truly make us feel great, not from random pictures made in three minutes using the latest meme app. Our motivation should be more about our long term health and wellbeing than just our aesthetics.
Yes we should eat right and yes we should exercise but we shouldn’t feel the need to slave away for hours a day on next to no sustenance. Instead we should concentrate on moving in any way that brings us joy and eating good quality whole foods because they make us feel good inside and out.
Back to my story and fast forward 3 years. Now my life is full of real health and fitness inspiration and motivation but it’s not the sort you find when you do a Google image search. My fitness inspiration comes from beautiful long walks coastal walks with my fiancé, messing about on my skateboard or paddle board and lifting heavier weights than I ever thought possible.
Food for me is about trying new flavours and playing around with recipe ideas and my health motivation is about being the happiest and best version of myself for decades to come and sharing that with the people I love. That’s FITSPO right there and that’s something we can all achieve if it’s what we want.
Bec Sharp is a Sydney-based strategic psychotherapist, clinical hypnotherapist and performance coach. She likes water sports, cats, AFL, cricket and weights and is obsessed with cat videos. You can find her at The Sharp Mind and on Instagram.
